A New Direction

       It's amazing how sometimes, one phone call can change your entire perspective on something, and Sharilyn and I were privileged to have received just such a call a few weeks ago.

It was a Monday morning when I received a text from a mutual friend of ours, asking if our casket was available. The timing of this message was so incredible. We had just had our weekly meeting the night before. At the end of it, I know we were both feeling a little overwhelmed and frustrated. Running a not for profit like this can be a little daunting, there is so much that we want to do, and so many that we want to help. This all takes a lot of money though, and it's been a challenge to raise the funds necessary to get the casket construction up and running.

     However, this message from our friend made us realize a few things. Mostly, that we need to define exactly what we do and who we do it for. Previously, our goal was to make our caskets available for families who had lost an infant within the first 6 months of life. Well, our friend was reaching out to us on behalf of a family who's baby had passed at 7 months old. When she told me the story, my heart ached for this family. This has always been a very personal venture for us, far more for Sharilyn and her family though. But that day, September 10, my own son was exactly 7 months old. When I looked at him smiling at me, I began to cry. Her baby was one month older than our age limit, but I wanted so much to reach out to that mother, who ever she was, and hug her. I wanted to comfort her for her loss. How could I think about a woman who had lost a child, a baby, and do nothing to help? Regardless of whether he was 6 months, 7 months or 2 years old, there was something inside of me that could not let this go, and neither could Sharilyn.

       As we  talked about our options and what we could do to help this family, we decided to take a break, each of us think about what would be appropriate and wait for more news from our friend.  We didn't have a casket ready to go and I was so frustrated with myself for not having done more to push the foundation forward. For not having fought so hard to find the thousands of dollars to be able to be ready to offer more for this family. I was angry and disappointed in myself. I never wanted this venture to be something that would let someone down. That was my biggest fear with starting this is that at some point, some family would be hurt because we weren't ready or able to help them when they needed it the most. I felt like that is exactly what I would do if we didn't do SOMETHING to help.  I just couldn't articulate what needed to be done, but kept getting the prompting of,  "Don't let this opportunity pass."

When Sharilyn called that afternoon, she had more news about the family , and the insight that was dancing around in my head but couldn't find.  She asked simply, "What if we changed our mission? There are a lot of other expenses involved in a funeral that we can help with, even if we aren't ready for the caskets yet.". It sounds so simple, but it was truly a beautiful moment. It was the direction and clarity that we have needed for so long.

     In a matter of hours, our frustration at not being able to do more was shifted to a more purposeful, directed mission that would allow us to help so many more, so much faster. We were humbled by this experience to help this family. I wish I could have been with her when Sharilyn met this wonderful mother who had given her baby seven beautiful months of life. While we grieve with her for her loss, we thank her for the opportunity to open our foundation to change and grow and see the mission that we can better fulfill now.
Best wished to all,
Mindy